So, what happens NEXT?!?
“It is the opposite of spontaneous combustion”, says Frenchy. “I am taking every precaution imaginable”.
Up walks Doc and Nurse Heidi.
“She’s right you know”, confirms Doc. “The condition is called Spontaneous Detonation”.
“See!”, exclaims Frenchy as she points at Charmy’s huge nose.
“Not sure if that is a real thing”, mumbles Nurse Heidi.
“Oh, it is”, confirms Doc. “I have seen it happen in person when I studied in the jungles of Vietnam”.
“Are you sure it wasn’t people stepping on land mines?”, asks Heidi.
“I know the difference between a land mine and a human being”, says Doc with a conceited eye roll. “I am a Doctor, ya know”.
“Yes, how could I ever doubt you”, says Heidi with hard sarcasm in her voice.
“Holy Macca Noodle!” yells Charmy as he now becomes a believer. “How can we avoid blowing up to millions of pieces”!!!
“Well, let me ask you something”, suggests Doc. “What element causes something to explode?”
“Vindictive ex-girlfriends!”, says Charmy.
“Spicy tacos from a gas station!”, says Weaver.
“Being stuck in an elevator listening to Kenny G!”, says Frenchy.
“Watching weaver eat his egg salad sandwiches!” says Charmy.
“Yeah dude”, says Frenchy. “That is SO gross”.
“No, it is the expansion of mass and a rapid pace”, says Doc.
“Well, that is why I go to church only during Holidays”, says Charmy.
“Yep! Leap day and April Fool’s day”, says Frenchy… “That is if those dates fall on a Sunday.”
“You guys are gonna burn in Hell”, says Weaver. “I go twice a week. Wednesday and Sunday”.
“You go on Wednesdays so that you get out of mid-week army drills”
“Still counts”, says Weaver.
“So, what do we need to do Doc?”, asks Frenchy.
“Meditation”, says Doc. “When you feel stressed, you need to stop and meditate”.
“Genius”, says Charmy.
“Have you ever seen a hippie or a monk blow up?” asks Doc.
“Have you ever really seen ANYONE blow up”, mumbles Nurse Heidi.
“That’s it!”, says Charmy. “We will become hippies”!
Up walks Flimp the Chimp with love beads, hippy sunglasses, and long hair.
“Groovy!” exclaims Frenchy.
END
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